literature

The Elven Bride (part two)

Deviation Actions

SteelFanged's avatar
By
Published:
177 Views

Literature Text

The Elven Bride and Newborn Prince.
(Part Two)
By Wyatt Nelson


    The sun shone down upon the small group of travelers as they made their way steadily south through the deep fields of snow. The cold northern wind blew at their backs, causing them to hunch over the saddles of their shaggy horses.
    They had left castle Kaiah'Nor the previous week, on a gray cloudy morning with a south wind that was just as cold as the north, blowing in their faces. Gwynlen had tried to convince his uncle to let him accompany them, without success. Morann told his nephew that they were just going so that they could perform the soul bonding ritual and that they didn't plan on staying very long, and they would travel faster if it was just him, Kasa'Kerrie, and a group of guards as escort. And of course they had too take one of the priests to perform the ritual.
    After a week on their journey they were nearing the Kaiah'Nor border. The snow underfoot was less deep, the wind a little less freezing and the sun a little warmer.
    Kasa'Kerrie kept her eyes focused on the trail ahead, for as the weather got progressively warmer and they neared civilized lands, so too did the possibility of running onto bandits increase. Although you would think they'd be discouraged from trying to attack with the thirty armed guards traveling with them. But one never knew, they had to pass by the edge of a thick forest right before they entered human domain.
    Her worries proved useless however, as they passed the forest the next day. Despite herself and knowing what was waiting for them at their destination, Kasa'Kerrie was starting to enjoy the trip. Perhaps it was the prospect of what lay ahead, but she found she was wishing that they would never reach castle Delguard, and instead continue traveling across unexplored land, uncovering mysteries and hidden secrets. But such a thing was impossible.
    The weather proceeded to get increasingly warmer, so that Kasa'Kerrie found she no longer needed to wear her thick wool scarf. She shifted in her saddle as she unwound it from her neck and slipped it into her saddle bags.
    In the evening on the fifteenth day they arrived in front of the gates to Delguard castle. The guards let them through without any trouble and they rode on into the castle courtyard. There they dismounted and gave their horses over to the stable boy while a runner was sent to inform the king of their arrival. As they waited, one of the king's personal servants approached them.
    "If you would follow me please," He said with a bow. "I'll show you to the private visitors' chamber." He then lead the way into the castle. All the guards but two were lead away by another servant and shown where they could put the luggage and wait for the their king. Kasa'Kerrie, her father, and the priest were shown to a comfortable sitting room with cushioned sofas and chairs.
    "Please be seated, his highness, king Mathian will be with you in a moment." After bowing once more, the servant left the room via another door off to the left.
    Her father sat down on one of the two sofas in the room, and after a moment of hesitation, the priest sat down in a chair off to the right. Kasa'Kerrie had just chosen her chair when the door the servant had left through opened once again and in walked king Mathian. He had a smile on his heavily bearded face, and his eyes held a warm light. He walked over to the sofa across from the one king Morann was sitting in and sat down, waving aside the formalities as he gestured for them all to remain seated.
    "Please, no need to stand on ceremony," He said jovially. "Let us sit and talk as old friends, Morann." Morann smiled at his old friend and inclined his head respectfully.
    "As you wish, Mathian." Her father said with an easygoing smile. They clasped hands in a firm handshake before sitting back in their seats.
    "You needn't had hurried you know." Mathian said with a good nature chuckle "I apologize for not seeing at the gate with a warm welcome, but I didn't expect you for another day or two at least, and then my steward comes into my room and says that the king of Kaiah'Nor is at my doorstep!"
    "I apologize if we inconvenienced you, but I thought it best to get the ritual over with as soon as possible, to stop the court from making more of a fuss about it then they already have." Morann said with a rueful smile.
    "Well, no matter." Mathian said, waving the apology aside with an air of dismissal. "So," He said, turning his soft brown eyes on Kasa'Kerrie. "This is your daughter then? It's a pleasure to meet you princess Kasa'Kerrie." He said, extending his hand to the princess, who excepted it in a quick grasp. "I Would like to say I'm sorry for our selfishness in deciding things behind your back ,and also I'd like to thank you from the bottom of my heart for doing this." Mathian said with a very serious expression on his face. Kasa'Kerrie was temporary taken aback but his sincerity, but recovered quickly.
    "There's no need to thank me, it's an honor to serve my kingdom." Kasa'Kerrie answered.
    "Damn the kingdoms!" Mathian said suddenly, a scowl on his face. "for a moment here, lets forget about duty and responsibilities and speak as individuals! If you really don't want to marry my son, now's the time to back out, and I won't hold it against you. This is a big decision to be made, and one that should not be taken lightly, as it will decide the fate of you, my son, and the two kingdoms."
    "Think about it very carefully my dear," Morann said softly. "Because the ritual will be performed the day after tomorrow."
    Truth be told, Kasa'Kerrie had thought of nothing else but this moment, ever since her father told her about the engagement four and a half weeks ago, and responsibility was weighing heavily on her shoulders. The decision was all on her, as Norai'ah wasn't old enough to give his opinion. She held the fates of too many people in the palm of her hands, it was too overwhelming, too much for a single person to decide.
    Slowly, Kasa'Kerrie became aware that her father and king Mathian were speaking again.
    "So, how is the little prince doing? And are you used to being a father yet?" Morann asked with an amused chuckle.
    "He's doing wonderful." Mathian said with a fond smile. "It's feeding time right now, but you can see him in a few minutes if you'd like. And as far as fatherhood, I'm completely out of my depth here! Sometimes I wonder how my father did it, and I find myself amazed that I turned out as well as I did!"
    "I still recall the letter you sent me nearly nine months back, saying that your wife was about to give birth and begging me to come and give you advice on how to be a father!" Morann chuckled.
    "You shouldn't tease." Mathian warned. "I'm sure you were just as helpless as I was when your firstborn came!" Mathian scowled and crossed his arms sulkily, the expression was ruined somewhat by the wide grin that quickly broke out across his face.
    "Would you also like to see him, your highness?" Mathian turned his warm gentle gaze upon Kasa'Kerrie.
    "Oh...um, uh sure." She said, taken aback slightly by the sudden question. They continued to talk for some time. Once, the king's steward returned with snacks and tea, and then he showed the priest to his room, and the place were the ritual would be performed, so that he could start getting ready and everything would be set up in time for when the day finally arrived.
    The king lead Kasa'Kerrie and her father out through the door he had entered from, and down a hallway lined with tapestries, then up two flights of stairs and finally they stopped at a closed mahogany door. He knocked lightly upon the wood, and they heard a woman's voice reply.
    "Enter." And after that, King Mathian gently pushed the door open.
    Sitting in a chair by a crib, softly cradling a small bundle in her arms was a woman with long, braided brown hair.
    "How is he?" Mathian asked in a hushed voice. His wife looked up and smiled at him.
    "He just fell asleep." She whispered back. And then her eyes fell upon Kasa'Kerrie and they softened even more.
    "Come closer, don't be shy." She said. Kasa'Kerrie hesitated a moment before walking into the room. She stopped and looked down at the small child wrapped in his warm blanket, unaware that the one who would decide it's future was standing less then two feet away.
    What would you do? She silently asked as she watched it's peacefully sleeping face. A gentle comforting hand touched her arm and she looked up and met the soft gray eyes of queen Jewliah.
    "Whatever you decide, I'm sure it will be the right choice." She said with a kind smile. A hand was placed on Kasa'Kerrie's shoulder and she turned and saw king Mathian standing behind her.
    "Why don't I show you to your room and we'll let mother and child rest for a bit." He said. She nodded and turned to follow him and her father out.
    "You can come back anytime you like." Jewliah spoke softly. "I'm sure, Norai'ah would love it if you visited with him."
    King Mathian lead them down further corridors and hallways, and down a flight of stairs before they arrived at the guest chambers. As Kasa'Kerrie opened the mahogany door to the room she had been taken to, she noticed that her luggage had already been brought before her.
    "Dinner will be ready soon." Mathian said as she walked over to her things. "Will you be dining with us? Or would you prefer to eat in your room?" He asked. Kasa'Kerrie turned to face him.
    "I'll dine with you, if it's not too much trouble." She replied. King Mathian smiled at her.
    "It's no trouble at all!" He said heartily. "I'll send one of the servants for you when it's time." With that, he turned to her father. "And your room is over here, right across from your daughter's." And he closed the door to Kasa'Kerrie's room as they departed.
    Kasa'Kerrie started to unpack her things but stopped halfway and threw herself onto the bed. So, she thought. That was her future husband to be. It was hard to imagine him being anything other then a child. She stared up at the white-wood ceiling above her head blankly. All of a sudden she started chuckling inanely to herself. If she were to have grandchildren, she could tell them that she had held their grandfather when he was a baby! Wouldn't that have been a story to tell. She sobered again in an instant. It was all so unreal it almost felt as though it weren't really happening.
    There was a sudden knock at her door, and she quickly got to her feet and brushed off her travel clothes, as she still had not taken them off yet. She went over to the door and opened it. Standing on the other side was a serving maid.
    "Pardon me, your highness but I was told to ask if you'd like to bathe before the meal." She said with a curtsy. Kasa'Kerrie hesitated only a second, as she realized she had not bathed in two weeks, since they had left castle Kaiah'Nor.
    "I bath would be most welcome." She said with a sincere smile. "Let me just get a fresh pair of clothes and I'll be ready to leave."
    The maid lead her down the corridor and down to the first level before they reached the bathing room. There was a deep impression in the floor that was already full of steaming water.
    "This is the ladies bath. The men have their own on the other side of the castle." The maid explained. Kasa'Kerrie removed her clothes and stepped into the hot water and sighed in satisfaction as she submerged herself all the way up to her shoulders. The warmth of the water eased the cramps out of her stiff, tired muscles and washed away all the dirt from her two weeks of  travel. As she soaked in the wide open bath, the maid washed and combed the snarls out of her long dark blue hair, and before long it was almost as though she had never been on a journey that had lasted fifteen days.
    After she was done washing and redressing, the serving girl lead the way back to her room, where she combed her hair again. And then she left after promising to return to get Kasa'Kerrie for dinner.
    As Kasa'Kerrie arrived at the dining table, she noticed that she was the last one to sit down. Her father and king Mathian were at the head of the table talking and laughing and generally catching up since the last time they had seen each other. The elven priest was sitting alone with a book opened under his sharp, eagle-like nose and a fork halfway to his mouth, forgotten. And then she caught the eye of the queen, who smiled at her and gestured for Kasa'Kerrie to come sit next to her.
    The meal wasn't anything extravagant, but there were a lot of foods Kasa'Kerrie had never tried before, and she enjoyed the change from the customary food of the north. As she ate, queen Jewliah talked with her.
    "I'm rather partial to the fishcakes myself," She said as she put a small portion on her plate. "They go so well with the sweat and sour cream, but the baked bread goes good with the chicken gravy. It brings back memories of when I was a little girl living with my older sister and parents. I was the daughter of a duke before, Math married me. I had been engaged to a count when the young king Mathian showed up at the duchy one evening, he was going around from place to place, and people said he was looking for a bride. Personally I think he was just bored and wanted to ride around the kingdom." Queen Jewliah said with a smile.
    "He was very young and brash back then. Of course, he was only sixteen when his father died in a riding accident, and he took up the crown. Well, anyway, he showed up at our doorstep with his escort of mounted guards, asking to be put up for the night. Of course, my father couldn't turn him down, he was the king after all. But Mathian had ended up staying for almost two weeks, and apparently he had taken quite a fancy to me. A week after he left, he came back and proposed to me. Of course, he had no idea I was already engaged to a count by my father's design. At first I was going to refuse him." Jewliah said with a rueful look. "Although I didn't want to, after all, I had come to like him very much too, but I had never disobeyed my father before, and I don't think I could have, even for the king. But my father over heard us and quickly interrupted. I suppose he was hoping that allowing me to marry the king, there was a chance he could advance his own position." Jewliah stopped and took a drink of water.
    "Well, my sister married the count, and I married the king, and everybody was happy. Except for my father, who remained as a poor duke with very little land." After she finished her tale, a long silence followed as Kasa'Kerrie thought over it.
    "You're highness, may I ask you something?" She wondered hesitantly. The queen gave her a curious look and gesture for her to continue. "What do you think of this whole affair concerning your son? You must have some worries about it." A thoughtful expression appeared on queen Jewliah's face as she considered the question.
    "I won't lie, I do have my doubts and worries as a mother, but after meeting you and understanding what kind of person you are, a lot of my concerns have eased." She answered with a kind smile. "I can tell you are a kind, gentle girl with wisdom beyond your peers, and I think my son would be extremely lucky if he were to find someone like you in his lifetime." Kasa'Kerrie was taken aback by her straightforward and sincere answer.
    "Thank you." She said, recovering quickly. "But..." She hesitated again. "I'm older then you, your husband, and your son. There will always be that age gape, and it could be very awkward."
    "Yes," The queen admitted. "But no more awkward then it is for me to talk to you as though you were my own daughter, despite the fact that, as you pointed out, you are many years older then I am. Wisdom and intelligence doesn't necessary come with age. It's the experience one gathers in life, and in that, dear girl, I have gathered much more then you." She said with a partly teasing, partly serious smile, and a meaningful look in her eyes. Kasa'Kerrie was once again taken aback, but as she thought about it, she suddenly started to laugh.
    "I suppose your right." She said, wiping the tears from her eyes. "I never thought of it like that before. Your wisdom is sound, but it still doesn't make it any easier for me." Kasa'Kerrie said, sobering almost instantly.
    "No one said it was going to be easy." Queen Jewliah said with a sympathetic look. The rest of the meal passed with regular conversation, and afterward everyone retired to their respective rooms.
    That night, Kasa'Kerrie lay awake in bed with the feeling that something was not quite right. It felt as though the whole world had suddenly started to hold it's breath as if in anticipation of something. The feeling was not one she was used to, and she felt restless and wide awake. Throughout the night the feeling persisted, until she finally started to doze off around dawn.
The second part of my short story. Part one come be found here [link]
Again, I'd love to hear your thoughts on this story.
© 2012 - 2024 SteelFanged
Comments2
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
3Fangs's avatar
Well, there are MANY misspellings in this one—instead of correcting them myself, I'll just highlight them in my “in-depth” critique. Perhaps seeing them yourself will help keep some of them in mind so they don't happen again. (Although, then I suppose your proof-reader/editor *me* would be out of a job if you stopped making mistakes.) ;p

You seem to have a decent grasp of what you WANT to tell, but it doesn't quite match up with what you ARE telling. I mean to say that I understand the undercurrent emotions of the characters, but I don't FEEL them. It's like an actor merely reading their lines without the proper emotions being expressed. The words tend to lose their impact.

I want to say that I'm pleased Queen Jewliah expressed concern for the arrangements made for her newborn son, because (though I have no experience in the matter) most mothers would be rather protective and perhaps somewhat selfish about their children—especially if it's her first baby. I mean, mothers/fathers may have a hard time when their children GROW UP and get married, but to have a newborn baby's future all planned out for them must be a little distressing. That being said, I liked the fact that she expressed concern, but I didn't really BELIEVE it. (Meaning you expressed her emotion in a somewhat “flat” way—like in my example of an actor reading their lines without tone or feeling.)

The ready acceptance of everyone in this story of the plot makes it lose some of the emotional punch I think you may be going for.
It may be because it's so short, and you need to keep the pace moving, but this sort of story will really do better with more build-up, especially on characters and their involvement/emotion.

Just something to think about for the re-write, I suppose. =)

I think you have a lot of “tell” and less “show” with your words.
I'm afraid I have no critique on how to improve that, as I have less experience in writing than even you. ^///^;

I suppose that's all for now for this chapter...:iconblush--plz: